Love and Riddles: How often do you say you love someone important to you?

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Devotional Blog:

Topic: “Love and Riddles”, 12/6/2011, Song of Songs (Solomon) 2:1-17

So I’ll be jumping around a bit as I play catch up in my devotional blog ‘series’ out of this book. I’m combining two entries in this blog. So Song of Songs or Solomon as its called in some Bibles is quite the ‘lovers’ book. It’s very short, only 8 short chapters (about 4 Bible pages) and sits between Ecclesiastes and Isaiah. I kept missing it when I was flipping through my Bible trying to find it. And the book is all about love and how to treat your lover. And how can you not think this books is about desire with verses like:

1:2 Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth–for your love is more delightful than wine. 1:13 My lover is to me a sachet of myrrh resting between my breasts.  1:16 My love is mine and I am his… 7:9-12 May the wine go straight to my lover, flowing gently over lips and teeth. I belong to my lover and his desire is for me. Come, my lover, let us go to the countryside let us spend the night in the villages. Let us go early to the vineyards to see if the vines have budded, if their blossoms have opened,and if the pomegrantes are in bloom–there I will give you my love.

In spite of the lack of explicitly religious content, Song of Songs can also be interpreted as an allegorical representation of the relationship of God and Israel, or for Christians, Christ and the Church or Christ and the human soul (Cited from Wikipedia).

What struck me was the sincere passion these two characters within this book had for each other. Like all good internet junkies I googled “love”… Continue reading →

Play by play, frisbee in Vietnam

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So this past weekend Tyghe and I went to Vietnam, Ho Chi Minh City (a.k.a. Saigon) for a frisbee tournament. The city itself is very different than Bangkok, it has more of a European flair/influence in the architecture of many buildings and baguettes on every corner. There are also millions of motorbikes…I think they outnumber cars. Attempting to cross the street was harrowing at first because the cars and bikes never really stop they simply just ‘magically’ part as you walk slow and steady across the street. As soon as you got used to that, walking around became easier. We stayed in Backpacker central which is equivalent to Khao San Road in Bangkok and it was interesting a lot of cool bars and cafes. I had high hopes of doing some exploring there but unfortunately we ran out of time…can only take so much time off work as it is. But we were there to play some frisbee and did we ever!

So here’s a snapshot of the trip/tournament from the point of view of a relative ‘newcomer’ to the frisbee world on her first out of country (I live in Thailand) hat tournament…

Continue reading →

Assessing the pathogenic potential of people

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So it’s been a good while since I have posted anything as I’ve been attending a conference in Philadelphia, PA put on by the American Society of Tropical Medicine and Hygiene. Following the denouement of the conference I found myself at El Vez restaurant, awesome restaurant by the way, just down from my hotel sipping on a very strong (apparently) pomegranate margarita and going over my notes whilst eating lunch. And for those of you following my blog and know I’m fasting–before you cry foul, this week I’m off it due to a number of reasons but will promptly re-initiate when I return to Bangkok. When one is fasting for a year…actually turns out to be a little longer, I have to allow myself a certain modicum of sanity. Or rather preserve what I have. In anycase, back to matter at hand…

So I’ve been at this conference for the past week and it’s proven very informative though I feel like a small genetic fish swimming in a sea of immunology and epidemiology which is a bit disconcerting, especially since I come from a completely environmental background with minimal medical/clinical knowledge.

Now I am a genetic data cruncher who enjoys population level analysis with some mathematical modelling thrown in for good measure…

I know right? The personal ad practically writes itself. Continue reading →

Scaling smooth inner walls of trust

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Ok after yesterdays sidetrack event of commenting on a blog I’d read entitled “I’m Christian unless you’re gay” (read it if you get a chance), now, back to the book…

Devotional Blog:

Topic: “Trust”, 11/27/2011, Jeremiah 31:1-6 and Ruth 3:5

In this section the author, Pam, goes into what it means to have a trusting relationship. She opens with something Ruth said in the Bible: “I will do whatever you say”–what guy wouldn’t want to hear that from a woman? Sorry guys, she was saying it to her mother-in-law. I find the concept of trust interesting in that I have some friends that are incredibly trusting and some that have some incredible walls built up…hell you need some seriously specialized climbing gear to get up the smooth face of their walls.

Then you inevitably ask the question ‘is it worth it?’ Which is terrible I know, they are your friend after all. But it is exceedingly frustrating to think you are making progress only to find yourself on a temporary ledge with your friend laughing at you from above…continually saying ‘you don’t know me, you can never know me’. At that point I’d just rather rappel down and call it a day. Of course self-discovery and self-trust is an ongoing process and I’m sure I’ve frustrated many a friend as well, even though I wouldn’t say I put up walls…I think rather its just a fundamental misunderstanding of personalities. You build an image of what you think someone is in your head and when that turns out to be untrue it throws you for a loop. Not because they misled you but because you built this image that wasn’t who they were inside. Its not a matter of ‘good or bad’, its just not who they were and you have to step back and decide if you are going to take the time to dispense with all your, perhaps years of, preconceived notions and really get to know the person for who they are. Sometimes we are able to do that, sometimes circumstances prevent that option.

I used to say I was very ‘guarded’ didn’t really trust anyone–but who am I kidding…its not who I am. At best I had phases of distrust that ended up evaporating as the event that triggered the distrust faded. Personally I’m a pretty open book, people don’t have to work too hard to read me. At first I was insulted because I thought of myself as a chameleon, I could put on whatever face was required and they’d never know ‘me’. So when people said  I was easy to read I was aghast…and here I thought I was this great actress. This was when it was ‘hip’ to be mysterious…ya, no, I’m not mysterious haha. I was in theater from 6th grade up through high school and some in college and didn’t get bad reviews. As an actress, ok I didn’t suck, but as a person–who am I kidding–I suck at hiding my feelings. That doesn’t mean I wasn’t stubborn. Which I know probably drove some of my friends and boyfriends and family insane, knowing something was dreadfully wrong but not being able to truly pry it out of me. Continue reading →

God bless…no strings attached

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Unofficial Devotional Blog: (not in book, but I’m gonna write it anyway)

Topic: “love, judgement, right and wrong” (verses…many, see below)

Since I started this devotional ‘section’ to my blog I’ve talked about a lot of different topics introduced to me by this rather ‘fluffy’ devotional book that I’ve been making my way through. And I actually was going to write another entry based in that book but as I opened the link to start a new blog…all this came flowing out instead. For an introduction to how this all got started in all the ‘devotion’ stuff see the first blog about my attempt at keeping regular devotions and analyzing my faith. Topics ranged in this book from finding your ‘hidden sin (blog post)’, leadership and mentorship (blog 1, blog 2), family and finances (blog), wishing for a different life (blog), acceptance (blog), love and forgiveness (blog), relationships with non-believers (blog), trauma (blog), life purpose/being saved for something I wrote on the anniversary of 9/11 (blog) and many of the things I’ve said, done or written have gotten me pegged throughout life as a ‘lukewarm Christian’.

I read a blog post entitled “I’m Christian unless you are Gay” written by a guy whose blog I follow because he has interesting things to say. Since it’s been written it’s gotten 74K plus facebook ‘likes’ and has been shared I’m sure countless times to ‘mixed’ reviews sometimes. I am one of those that shared this post on facebook and now I am sharing it here with my own take. I encourage you to read his post (linked above) in its entirety as well as some of the responses to the post both negative and positive. He’s caused quite the firestorm and some of the responses were very powerful.

After reading his post and all the responses…two quotes stuck with me. Continue reading →

Thanksgiving in…Liberia?

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I knew Thanksgiving was celebrated in the USA and Canada but I didn’t know they celebrated Thanksgiving in Liberia, apparently it coincides with the Church’s harvest day. Interesting. I wonder if there’s a history of celebrating Thanksgiving there or if this was a one time 2010 venture.

This year given I have been taken in many times for holidays we are hosting Thanksgiving at our place. Though, I am not making a turkey as they are scarce and expensive in Thailand. Thais do not celebrate Thanksgiving but its always nice to have an excuse to go to someone’s house to eat and partake in general merriment celebrating what American children learn as our ‘dinner with the Indians’. Indians who we then learn later in school, we decimated with smallpox, measles, typhus and plague among other diseases and war. DOH! Continue reading →

flirting with…

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Devotional Blog:

Topic: “Not a Hint”, 11/19/2001, Ephesians 5: 3-7

The author has the uncanny ability to piss me off in some of these entries. Perhaps one page or less isn’t enough space for her to fully explain what she means by what she says. Or perhaps she intends to bother her readers and sound a bit high and mighty.  I’m not saying her choice of verses and topics aren’t good ones…though not all of them I can relate with, hence do not write about. I suppose I wish she was a little more encompasing in her topics. No I don’t want her to sugar coat ‘sin’ as she defines it but I’d like it if she didn’t freak out ‘new’ Christians who might pick up her book and think–holy ‘$%!@’ and question Christianitys sincerity. I’ll explain further. Continue reading →

Minions and Mentorship…

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Devotional Blog:

Topic: “Mentor Me”, 11/16/2011, Proverbs 9:9-12

I don’t know how many times since starting my postdoc that I’ve desired minions. Cohorts in my pursuit of viral evolution and ecology. Kindred spirits clad in lab coats and laced with the smell of phenol chloroform. Ok…really I just need people to help me with lab work that I like doing but I have less and less time to do as analysis and writing alone consumes me sometimes. But in return I’d like to mentor.

I mentored a very motivated undergraduate student while in grad school and she turned out quite apt and successful so I figure I did something right…and I tried at all costs to minimize her interactions with my boss who also happened to be her academic mentor. He had the uncanny ability to make many women (including myself at times) who worked in his lab want to staple things to his head and leave in a hail of frustrated cuss words and gunfire.

I mentioned in my last post that many topics in this book seem to be on repeat and I realize I posted a blog earlier on ‘leadership’ but I think this is different…the idea of leadership and mentorship. Ideally they should go hand in hand and I aspire to that but many times they don’t. There are many leaders that are terrible mentors and mentors that if you put them in charge of something wouldn’t know left from right practically speaking–rather they are gurus of ‘sense’. They are often the ones that you want to quote a lot because they inspire you, even if practically speaking they may not get a whole lot done.

Leaders you follow, mentors you quote. And if you have someone that is both, then  you get the great leaders of our time. But they all had to start somewhere. Continue reading →

Embarrassment

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Devotional Blog:

Topic: “Embarrassed”, 11/15/2011, Proverbs 22:4-16

So I haven’t blogged about the devotions I’ve been reading and yes, I have been reading them because so far they’ve been records on repeat, dealing with issues already discussed in the book…and I’ve only been reading since August. So I’m wondering at this point how many topics she’s going to deal with multiple times. I finally came across some more original ones, like yesterday’s.

In high school I had the meanest crush on a kid who was my friend freshman and sophomore year then went off that summer and got all buff from working out, pretty much lost all the acne and came back junior year HOT. With his newfound hotness and suddenly getting plenty of attention our friendship fell off to the side and while we were always friendly, it just was different now. I wasn’t exactly a hottie back then and therefore couldn’t exactly ‘compete’ for his affections. Prior to that, it was the classic one is interested while the other is not and vice a versa.

Anyway, during my crush phase I was walking around campus and saw him so of course I prolonged my look–just long enough to run smack into the middle of a pillar, hard enough it landed me on my ass. In the middle of morning break when the high school campus was full of kids (our campus wasn’t closed, it was several small buildings you had to walk between). And I wanted to crawl into a corner and die….of course.

Another time in high school, I saw my friends across the field at another building, they saw me, we waved and I jogged toward them…only to be hit by a golf cart, campus security. They weren’t paying attention, I wasn’t paying attention…it culminated on me ‘bug-splatting’ myself onto the golf cart and ‘melting’ off like in a cartoon while my friends laughed hysterically. I was a very accident prone child apparently.

Even as an adult I have my moments of lip syncing or tap dancing in the lab while experiments are running when I think no one is looking only to turn around and have an audience! DOH!

Such are these small embarrassments. I related this on facebook and actually got some pretty funny stories in response:

  • I once mooned my husband when we were playing racquetball – completely forgetting the court had a see through glass door! :)
  • When I had a stand up desk in he CCB I would listen to music and do little dances while I worked. Well I had forgotten that I had a meeting with a couple campus people and didn’t realize they had been standing there for a couple minutes watching me “get jiggy”
  • It happened several times that I was in the bus –crowded with people– and then I had an idea about solving a problem I had been thinking about for quite a while. Then I shouted “That’s why!” in a very loud voice. People would immediatly stare at me….
  • I pee in the forest when no one is looking. :)
  • On more than one occasion I’ve been extreme-coding with Pandora blasting when my advisor came in to the lab to chat… He starting clapping loudly to get my attention…

Good to know I’m not the only one.

Reflecting back all these situations are funny, though they were just shy of mortifying back then and of course EVERYTHING is more dramatic to a high school student. Funny thing is, some of us aren’t much better in adulthood, haha!

Its good to be reminded of humility. Speaking with Tyghe one time he said he thinks God throws situations at us just so he can laugh at our antics and reactions dealing with said situation. Or perhaps he doesn’t actually throw a situation but he’s certainly up there shaking his head and laughing for sure and most things us humans do.

Having an out of money experience

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Devotional Blog: “Family and Finance”, 11/4/2011; 1 Timothy 5:3-4, 8, 16

I took the title above from a quote by Author Unknown: “I am having an out of money experience”. It amused me.

So surprise, surprise this is yet another devotional entry in the book that I see differently than the author perhaps. Family, finances and lending money are huge topics. We all know that one of the biggest problems that can arise in a marriage can be over money or lack of it rather. I’ve seen money tear people and apart sometimes because of greed sometimes because of the emotions attached to the money that may have nothing to do with the money itself.

In the book, Pam talks about the duality of lending money to family that is discussed in the Bible. In 2 Corinthians 12:14 it states “…After all, children should not have to save up for their parents, but parents for their children.” and then in 1 Timothy 5:8 it states: “But those who won’t care for their own relatives, especially those living in the same household have denied what we believe. Such people are worse than unbelievers.” She then goes on to ask what should our responsibility be in terms of using our money to care for relatives/family? Her answer: “When in doubt, do like God recommends: ‘speak up for the poor and helpless, and see that they get justice (Proverbs 31:9). He doesn’t allow people to continue in unhealthy patterns, but if they have tried their best and fall short, his long arm of love reaches out.”

I agree with her statements and the verses she used in some respects. Continue reading →